With the help of some dark magic and a sacrifice or two I was finally able watch the entire Solomon Kane movie.
For those of you in the states who haven't seen it, rest assured I won't give anything away.
I'll only say that it was a pretty great flick and there were parts that Howard fans would be more than happy with.
Michael Bassett did a great job taking the material seriously and James Purefoy played the role of Kane with passion and dedication. They really did nail the screen presence of the character. Purefoy is staring in the upcoming Ironclad, btw)
Again, that's all I'll say about the film itself. You won't be disappointed.
What I am disappointed in, though, is the brainless, gutless drecks that represent the film distribution industry in Hollywood CA.
Why this film was never picked up and distributed to theaters or at least to video is beyond my comprehension. Considering the incredible amount of super-crap they release and re-release time and time again, I find it insulting to Bassett, Purefoy, and Howard himself that they couldn't toss us a tasty morsel in Solomon Kane.
Is it because of the violence?
Sure, it's brutal (a plus for any Swords and Sorcerery movie) but it's no more violent that most things on screen or on TV. Oh, maybe there weren't enough guns, I don't know?
Is it because some Christians would be upset?
Well, they get upset about almost anything these days, but a Puritian that kicks ass? How can you go wrong?
Is it because Adam Sandler isn't in it not being funny?
I'll let you answer that on your own.
Is it because you guys are threatened what it might do to your precious Conan the Barbarian release?
The suits might be nervous about that but Kane would have built up an anticipation to the Conan movie. Sure, comparisons would have been made, especially in the budget department, but come on guys, show some balls!
Is it because the general movie going audience is too dim-witted to take a chance on something they haven't seen before and prefer to watch sequel after sequel of the same story over and over?
Um..actually that's quite possible.
So what is it? Please tell me, 'cause I really want to know.
Cause it's a decent movie and has an audience and kids will rent it and think it's cool and who knows, maybe influence one of them to get creative.
So lets see what you deem release worthy for the month of June, shall we?
The Warriors Way
Nice! But why this and not Kane?
Season of the Witch
Really? Nicolas Kane?
Another Liam Neeson straight to video killing rampage flick. Okay, whatever.
Big Mammas: Like Father, Like Son
Just shoot me now!
Just Go With It
OMFG! Sandler AND Aniston??? Someone better have gotten fired for that one.
Hell, if you want to pay $30 million to watch James Cameron masturbate, I'll save you some cash!
I'd go on but it's too depressing.
So what is it Hollywood? What's the flippin' deal? I'd really like to know 'cause I'm just starting to think you guys are just too high to do your job.
To Bassett and Purefoy I give you kudos!
To Hollywood I give a kick to the nutz!
And for you Warlock readers who got to the bottom of this ranting post your reward is 20% off any Lulu order through Thursday June 30 by using the word: SUNSHINE305